Do you know who I am?

Once upon a time (to ensure this fictional story remains so) there was a snooty woman (for want of a better word) who liked to park in Double Bay in areas where parking was not permitted.
One day (on/around 6pm on Friday 28 March 2008) she decided to park in a no stopping zone, thus obstructing the view from the intersecting street, endangering pedestrian (she was exceptionally pedestrian, coincidentally) and driver alike.

It came to pass that fateful Friday that someone allegedly took a photo of the illegally parked car, shown below, and that was the end of the story. Or was it?

The perception of someone taking a photo reduced the danger to people in the suburb, for she must have felt compelled to move her emerald green ass, I mean mercedes, into a spot which was both licit and correct. The purpose of the photo gesticulation had worked. Public safety on the tough streets of Double Bay.

Alas, this was not the end. Upon walking to his alleged car, the alleged photographer (AP) was confronted by the overly made-up wench. "I saw you taking a photo of my car… what were you doing?" To which AP thought are you playing your own private game of Jeopardy? Protracted and heated conversation ensued. "I have two witnesses from the florist across the street that you took photos of my car. It is a breach of privacy!!!" So there were allegedly two people who saw an alleged person take alleged photographs of a car which resembles the one below, thus proving what? A breach of privacy, your honour… I THINK NOT. The AP thought that he couldn't defame the car even if he tried - and it would be Mercedes who may wish to bring such an action if it worked.

And then, out of the blue, this at-best N-list celebrity had the audacity to throw in a "Do you know who I am?" Here AP thought she didn't know what a rhetorical question was!!! AP believes that if he knew who she was, he would not even have given her the time of day and merely reported that DBW (double bay wench) had parked illegally again.
DBW demanded AP provide his driver's licence to her… for what purpose he knew not. She threatened to call the police, an idea which AP not only acceded to but lauded. Idle threats from a wannabe celeb. Sadly no police showed up.

Finally, the last straw was DBW allegedly took photos of AP's car (somehow a privacy breach can be matched by a subsequent privacy breach and they cancel eachother out - groundbreaking legal arguments unfamiliar to the author) and then a photo of AP himself.

The moral of the story… if you see a green Mercedes with licence plate ALR 19M, take a photo of the driver as you really ought know who she is.

It takes more than an ostrich to defeat purple

I was walking to the pharmacy and happened upon this mattress (see image, right). I was taken by the fact that it was a nice number (thirteen squared) but the real thing that got me was the fact that it is perfect for the person who has a home without a FLOOR.

"I am looking for a place for my rock hard mattress as I like to sleep on the road, but it's a bit noisy."

I wonder if you'd need to put sheets on it, otherwise it may lose its rocky'ness. I honestly don't understand this type of advertising. I also have issues with ads noting "or nearest offer". Is this really binding? Car for sale - $3500 o.n.o. and you offer the vendor $300... will they have to sell it to you? Always been one of those vexing questions.

Now, more drivel... the subject of this post was once a subject of an email I sent in 1997. It was a total stream of consciousness email which I sadly have lost to the aether (aka Rocketmail). For some reason the comic, above, brought up the memory of that (in)famous email. There is no logic behind this.

That's it for today. I have a Bollywood party tomorrow to prepare for.

Namaste...

El Quote:

I have a king-sized bed. I don’t know any kings, but if one ever needed to sleep over, I guess he’d be comfortable. “Oh, you’re a king, you say? Wait until you see what I have in store for you! It is to your exact specifications…I did not know you guys were all the same size. I think I can set your lady up too!”

Mitch Hedberg

Can the weather be clement?

Why is 0! = 1?

I'm not going to answer that question.

Having seen the film My Kid Could Paint That I feel that I am either cynical with things like this, persuaded by the documentary maker or some other reason that I've not had.

The main ratio of the film, to me, was the idea of art. The story's about a four-year-old kid who painted some great abstract art which people bought for thousands of dollars. It then seemed that maybe her dad did the painting, or at least finished it for her and sold it under her name. In spite of the doubt that I have on who painted the works, I found that it is the people who bought the art that irked me.

Are you buying the art because a four year old prodigy painted the work (and perhaps not like the art itself), or are you actually taken by the artwork for what it is - standing alone and speaking for itself? It seemed that when it was revealed that the girl may not be the artist, some of the "collectors" felt robbed. But they bought the painting!!!!

I am somewhat confused. Moliere Aware winner Yasmina Riza wrote "ART" which was quite on point about the reasoning, or lack thereof, about abstract art. Is there anything that needs to be understood or does it just have some form of pretense and people buy the art without explanation?

I understand if you buy a Klimt or Miro and it turns out to be a fake it is fraudulent and you are paying millions for a copy. But these people had bought art which was not in this category.

ALAS... it is quite the conundrum which is something to ponder.

To quote Ms Riza: "Read Seneca."

Le funny quote:

One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger."

Every picture is of you when you were younger.

"Here's a picture of me when I'm older."

"You son of a bitch! How'd you pull that off? Lemme see that camera!"

- Mitch Hedberg

A wanton promptu posting

Having been pointed to How I met my wife by Jack Winter (The New Yorker, July 25, 1994) new forms of words have been popping into my head (such as transigent).

I don't know where time goes (in a metaphorical sense, rather than a 4th dimensional one) but somehow there are too many things to do which require time, and not enough of this said time to do so.

I have 20+ DVDs I would like to rent and watch merely on recommendation, I have myriad restaurants I'd like to try and many more to return to, I have stuff to do but just don't get around to it.

I want to return to places (Israel, Italy, Canada, Japan...) but for one of those destinations in the near future, I am not sure when I'll next get there.

I would like to write - about what I know not - but just to write for writing's sake (or for no reason at all). I need to paint in spite of my artistic limitations. I should get my piano tuned and disturb my neighbours... the ephemeral nature of music - created and lost so quickly (330m/s approximately) - yet itself a artistic creation on paper.

Strangely, there is nothing preventing any of this but some unseen, self-imposed, hurdle.

A nihilist I am not (Walter Sobchak: No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of. - The Big Lebowski) and I do a lot more than nothing (though some would debate this). I'm just seeking out how to attain some pursuits when there are finite constraints on what you can do.

There is no solution - it's an empty set - but this doesn't detract from aspirations. It is merely something to ponder and strive towards.

So, press play on the CD player with Glenn Gould interpreting Bach's 24 Preludes and Fugues (you can hear him singing if you listen closely), throw down an drop sheet and mantle your easel, take anything profound or inane as a catalyst and be creative...

Creativity and taking the plunge far outweighs any result that may transpire.

The quote:

As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods;

They kill us for their sport.

- William Shakespeare

Can the weather be clement?

Some random drivel:

• Does the USA really think there'd be no need to test NASA astronauts for being drunk? I know they think the image of their country appears more like the one here (right). And I admit that it's potentially not as dangerous as driving on roads as traffic to space is far less busy, but it is something rather pathetic in any case.
• Why is 0! = 1 ? That's something that irks me. I would donate money to a branch of the UN that eradicates use of the phrase "could of", "should of", "would of" etc.
• Is anyone else over harry potter? I may be alone, but j'en doute...

My PC just crashed and saved only up to here... so I'll post and alleviate the ennui and ire.

Ye olde quote (two this time):

My plumbing is all screwed up. Because it turns out, I do not own a garbage disposal. — Demetri Martin

A metaphor is like a simile. — Steven Wright

Königsberg Bridge - now charging tolls each way

Perhaps it is me... no, it is me that presumes what is read on this blog is understood. I think it's quite the opposite.

I write, and mention things like the subject of this posting and just assume y'all know what I am on about. Or if you don't, that when you read that it was Euler who solved the Königsberg Bridge problem, that you know who he was.

Sure, it's not "common" knowledge, but are you really common?Most people who read this (you're in a set of about 10 people, I think) are anything but common, yet I fear I confuse you.

My care factor, fortunately, hovers on or about zero, so my postings will continue in spite of your feedback, or lack thereof.

One thing I have noticed is the prevalence of blogs and its effect on society. For example, it has helped physics extend well beyond the usual small circle of in-the-know doctors and professors. A recent article in the NY Times noted that now with blogs even string theorists who can't spell Higgs became immediately aware of inside information about D Zero data. And I'm sure you're all happy about this (I am).

And a new segment to my blog, a stream of consciousness (followed by the usual quote):

Higgs Boson, ablative, diminished 5th in phrygian mode, somnambulation, Furano, Brownian motion, HDL is good cholesterol, monopoles, Klimt and laminar flow.


Today's quote:
I used to buy a lot of M&Ms, they're a delicious candy. But then I switched to aspirin. I find that if you hand your friend two aspirin, he doesn't look at you like you're selfish.
Mitch Hedberg

The Middle Name - or lack thereof

I was not born with a middle name and this appears to put me in the minority, at least with the people I know... it's harder to gauge whether or not someone has one when you seem them in the street.



There are famous people with middle names - F. Scott Fitzgerald and Harry S Truman to note but two. And interestingly (to me) Harry Truman's middle name is "S" and therefore both a middle initial and name.



There are people who can include a nickname in their common name, such as I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, and yet here I am with a First Name and a Surname, and nothing betwixt.



Not that it's a problem, but I have been pondering the benefit of adopting a name. I am unsure why, but I have been told that G. Dustin should replace my first name. It has not taken off (yet) but I like the full stop and GDS does have a ring to it.



I'm taking suggestions for a middle name, and if it's good enough, it may be adopted by Deed Poll. If not, you can probably still call me by that new name - for I am one for new coinage.



Until that time, I remain yours:



GS/GDS/Steak/Sir L/Capt G/CC/any other name I'm given, frankly (other than Frankly)





Today's quote

I had amnesia once or twice.
Steven Wright